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I started accepting every Facebook invite, reaching out to friends I hadn’t seen in awhile and inviting them to get coffee, and I even joined a book club.And while I had some successes, what I’ve discovered is that making friends in your 30s is really freaking hard.
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Some have modernized enough to be looking for the “Abbi to their Ilana,” but this is always immediately followed by “If you get this ref, we can be besties!
”, which, it ain’t that obscure a reference, sister, especially when I’ve read it on 50 other girls’ profiles already today. Evidently, no one else agrees, because I don’t get any matches, not even when I get desperate and start right-swiping everyone like a horny dude playing the odds.
It all culminated when I experienced my first holiday season as an unpartnered adult, which I spent largely feeling like shit about myself while scrolling through social media images of my friends broadcasting their togetherness with their assorted loved ones.
In a come-to-Jesus moment, I found myself looking around at 34 and fearing that I hadn’t done enough to prioritize the non-love relationships in my life.