Funny seinfeld quotes dating

This is no longer just some crazy notion, Elaine, Jerry. Just hurling through space in your living room, watching TV. The only difference between a date and a job interview is that in not many job interviews is there a chance you'll end up naked at the end of it.

That's why all the aliens were always dropping in, because Kirk was the only one that had a big screen. "Well, Bill, the boss thinks you're the man for the job.

My neck is stiff, my voice is weak, I hardly whisper when I speak. (At this point, I was ready to stick the kid in a meat-flavored sack and throw him to the wolves.)” ― Rick Riordan From the author of the popular Weather Warden series comes the debut of an exciting new series set in Morganville, Texas, where you would be well advised to avoid being out after dark.

My tongue is filling up my mouth, I think my hair is falling out. College freshman Claire Danvers has had enough of her nightmarish From the author of the popular Weather Warden series comes the debut of an exciting new series set in Morganville, Texas, where you would be well advised to avoid being out after dark.\n\n College freshman Claire Danvers has had enough of her nightmarish dorm situation.

Why don't you strip down and meet some of the people you'll be working with? "Oh, sorry, your rear end is too big." "That's ok, your breath stinks anyway.

"What would the world be like if people said whatever they were thinking, all the time, whenever it came to them? See you later."Seems to me the basic conflict between men and women, sexually, is that men are like firemen.

We position ourselves on either side of Peeta, lean over until our faces are inches frim his nose, and give him a shake. Every time we try to stop, we look at Peeta's attempt to maintain a disdainful expression and it sets us off again.” ― Suzanne Collins, “I cannot go to school today"Said little Peggy Ann Mc Kay."I have the measles and the mumps, A gash, a rash and purple bumps. And there's one more - that's seventeen, And don't you think my face looks green? " he asked."'Swing Set Needs Home,'" I said."'Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,'" he said."'Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,'" I said.” ― John Green, “Can you surf really well, then?

We're all throwing the dice, playing the game, moving our pieces around the board, but if there is a problem the lawyer is the only person who has read the inside of the top of the box.""What causes homophobia?

What is it that makes the heterosexual man worry about this?

To men, sex is an emergency, and no matter what we're doing we can be ready in two minutes. They're very exciting, but the conditions have to be exactly right for it to occur.

I had a parakeet that used to fly around the house and crash into these huge mirrors my mother put in.

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